I’m staring at the industrial, grey-speckled white tiles on the floor. My head droops, eerily similarly to the way my dog does when she knows she’s done something wrong. I sigh, move my hands to rub my neck tiredly, and briefly close my eyes, trying to block out the lecture my entire Latin class is being given.
“This is an honors class, and I expect you to work like one,” my Latin teacher says in a variety of different ways over the following 15 minutes. It’s always like this. At least once a week, we get told that we’re not working up to our potential, we’re not treating the class like we should, and it would be a lot easier if we prepared better.
Hold on. My ears hear a change in tone while I’m blankly staring at nothing, waiting for the misery to end.
I think…I think there was some good advice in there. Wait a second. I’ve got to wake up a bit. This sounds a little different.
“Don’t worry about the grade. If you learn the material, the grade will come.”
Hmmmmm. The tone changes back, though, so I go back to my own little world in the middle of Latin class. To at least pretend to be paying attention, I move around a little. Adjust my back, crack it, and then stare at the poster-covered wall in front of me. But the advice doesn’t leave my mind as quickly as my teacher’s tone changed.
That’s seems pretty smart, actually. You know, learning to learn. Not the quick memorization I was used to the night before the test. My chem homework would definitely be easier if I didn’t have to keep checking facts that I had “learned” for the first test. That trig test definitely would have gone better if I had learned the special angles, not just looked them over second period before the test.
I let my eyes wander again. Now I’m staring just past the teacher at the smartboard at the front of the classroom. Selectively blocking out my teacher’s voice, I can hear the history class moving around their chairs next door, and someone reaching into his backpack, probably a hand looking for a snack to get them through the next thirty minutes of yelling.
Woah, maybe this is why I remember some of that stuff from that sophomore year history class I took. I think that teacher was really big on this, too. I think I’ll always remember John Marshall’s court cases. Cohens v Virginia, Darmouth v Woodward, Marbury v Madison, Fletcher v Peck…
The icon for a new email pops up on the smartboard and it helps my mind to stop wandering so far. Right. Learning to learn. THAT must be what college is for. All of those websites have that line that says that they want critical and independent thinkers. Wow. I should probably get on this.
I let my eyes move again, because the teacher’s still droning on about how we’re really bad students. I need an A in this class so my GPA will be high so I can…hold on a second…If I legitimately learn Latin, my teacher’s pretty much guaranteeing me an A. And also I’ll know stuff. That seems like a win-win to me.
Also, I’ve always hated those grade-grubbers. Those kids that want every single point they can possibly manage to get the teacher to give them. Oh god. I hope I haven’t turned into one of them. I think I remember a time, maybe freshman year, when I was young and thought I should try to learn as much as possible. Actually, I think that’s why I took Latin. Yeah, it was. It’s not like I’m ever actually going to use this.
I only barely notice when the teacher finally falls silent. He’s staring at me. I look at him, realize he’s just asked me a question, and that I don’t know the answer. Also, everybody’s looking at me. I finally turn my attention back to what I should actually be doing.
But then I get to math class. And we’re doing review—the Kiss of a dementor would be preferable to this. I retreat quietly into my head, trying to remember what I was thinking about before. It was definitely something school-related…Oh yeah, learning for learning, not for grades.
That’s probably going to work out well for me when I’m older. After I get a job, I guess if I was learning only for grades, I wouldn’t have to learn anything anymore. I could get pretty uneducacated. Oh god, it’s starting. I’ve definitely got to read more often.
Darn it. My calc teacher’s looking at me expectantly. Like I should be giving him an answer. Luckily, my homework’s actually on my desk, so I just look at it, pick a random question and say my answer. Haha, escaped that trap, calc teacher.
So right. In that little section of my agenda pad, I should probably write down some of this stuff: “Learn things to learn them, not for grades. ‘Cause it’ll be important.” Good enough for government work.
Hmm. Maybe I should enlighten the administration. Seems like they have never been told this…Also, I could get out of some AP exams. Maybe then I’ll actually want to learn the material, not be forced to.
